Here in Atlanta you can feel the beginning of fall. The days are still warm but the mornings and evenings are more comfortable now. On some days, the sky is that deep blue that only happens when the humidity is low. Mowing after dinner is becoming less of an option as the hours of day light are noticeably diminishing and I’ve needed a sweatshirt, at least briefly, during several of my early morning walks. Best of all, there were several days in a row when I was able to turn off the air conditioning and open the windows wide to the fresh air. Fall is definitely my happy place. But there is something just a little bit sad about leaving the warm months behind and all the informality, spontaneity and freedom that summer implies.
Recently I came across this quote:
“I will love the light for it shows me the way, yet I will endure the darkness because it shows me the stars.” — Og Mandino
I’ve been aware lately that I need both – the light and the darkness. In particular, I’ve had days recently that were difficult, where I felt purposeless and aimless. When I’ve retreated into myself both literally and figuratively. But each and every time I read the above quote it reminds me to be patient and to understand that good work is being done, even and maybe especially, during those times when I feel that I’m searching for something that I can’t even name. I’ve made a commitment to myself to no longer live on automatic pilot but I’m still struggling to figure out what that looks like and feels like. The dark days are kind of like reset buttons…when I emerge I usually feel invigorated and optimistic and open. And that’s when I remember to feel gratitude and awe, to dream, and to create.