I write this post sitting at my desk by an open window. The setting sun touches the tops of the trees in my backyard. There’s a brisk breeze and the air from outside is cool. I’m listening to music as I work and periodically I get up and dance; I can’t help myself. It’s the first day of spring.
An entry from Sarah Ban Breathnach’s book, “Simple Abundance: A Daybook of Comfort and Joy”:
Some of us have remained dormant for years – oblivious to our genuine beauty – drugged senseless by our own numbing disapproval, nagging doubts, and benign neglect.
I was struck by the word dormant so I looked it up. Here’s what I found (Merriam-Webster): being in a state of suspended consciousness; asleep, dozing, napping, resting, sleeping, slumbering. Yes, the bad old days. And now? To cease sleeping; awake, aware, aroused, astir. No wonder things feel overwhelming these days.
Let me share a secret with you. One of the very best things about committing to working out is that you get to inhabit your body again. Just like it’s possible not to know who you really are, it’s also possible to dissociate from your body. And when this happens, we lose touch with a fundamental part of who we are as women.
Many years ago I became friends with a much older man. We knew each other from a weekly folk dancing group and periodically we would get coffee after dancing. G. was a joyful human being who was really smart about people. One night he told me that I was on the verge of being beautiful. His words were then and remain now so special to me because I knew what he meant. Being authentic is beautiful and I loved that he saw that potential in me.
I realize now that part of being authentic is feeling comfortable with and in our bodies, even when we’re not at our perfect weight. To own our femininity and sexuality. If you are like I was and have a long distance to go, be patient but persistent. Working out is a sure path to inhabiting your body again. Who knows what can happen next?